Little Ricky Is Broke:

Rick Santorum, the great white hope of men wearing dirty T-shirts who like to stroke their guns and scratch their privates in public, bowed out because of lack of funds, according to a story in today's New York Times.

Little Ricky, who likes to self identify with both David and Goliath, has, no doubt, left them weeping on K Street.

I don't know about you, but I'm going to miss seeing those beady little eyes staring out over his foot in his mouth. The Mormon is just too wimpy except when it comes to firing people. (Would you loan me the money for a hamburger today? I'll pay you back on the second Tuesday of next week. — Thanks, Popeye.)