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Outsourcing of Border Wall with Mexico:

In a special news conference held on the second Tuesday of last week, President Bush announced that he had been informed by Tricky Dick Cheney that America will outsource the construction of the wall to protect Mexican workers from unsrupulous American employers.

"In an effort to keep the cost of construction low," the president said, "we'll be outsourcing the labor of the construction of the wall to Mexico. We'll have the illegals build the wall themselves, but we're going to make them stand on the Mexican side of the wall to build it. That way the labor costs will be kept extremely low. Everybody knows that in Mexico hourly wages are much lower than they are here in 'Merica."

When questioned about the security issues that might be involved by having the very people one hoped to keep out of the country build the wall that was meant to keep them from coming into it, the president responded by saying that he had complete confidence in the integrity of the Mexican workforce. "If they're good enough for Wally-World, they're good enough for me," the president pronounced.